Friday, December 31, 2010

Friday Funnies ~~ Seven Degrees of Coonass, A Blonde & A Lawyer



 Here's one last Cajun joke squeezed in before the end of the year. May we all have a little more laughter and joy in 2011!!!

Love y'all. XXO  :)

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SEVEN DEGREES OF COONASS



FIRST DEGREE
Boudreaux and his wife were asleep when the phone rang at two in the morning.


Boudreaux picked up the phone, listened a moment and said, "How should I know? Dat's  200 miles from here!" and hung up.


The wife said, "Mais, Boo, who was dat?"


Boudreaux answered, "I don't know, some man wanting to know if da coast is clear."

SECOND DEGREE
Two Cajuns are walking down the street. One notices a compact on the sidewalk and leans down to pick it up. He opens it, looks in the mirror and says, "Hmm, dis person looks familiar." The second Cajun says, "Here, lemme see!" So the first Cajun hands him the compact. The second one looks in the mirror and says, "You dummy, it's me!"

THIRD DEGREE
Boudreaux suspects his wife of cheating on him, so he goes out and buys a gun. He goes to his house unexpectedly and when he opens the door he finds her in the arms of another man. Well, Boudreaux is really angry. He pulls out the gun, and as he does so, he is overcome with grief. He takes the gun and puts it to his head. His wife yells, "No, honey, don't do it!!!"


Boudreaux replies, "Shut up, you're next!"


FOURTH DEGREE
Boudreaux was bragging about his knowledge of state capitals. He proudly says, "Go ahead, and axe (ask) me, I know all dem  capitals." Thibodaux says, "OK, what's da capital of Wisconsin?"

Boudreaux replies, "Oh, dat's a easy one! It's W." 


FIFTH DEGREE
What did the Cajun girl ask her doctor when he told her she was pregnant?


"Is it mine?"


SIXTH DEGREE
Boudreaux, a Cajun in his fourth year as an LSU Freshman, sat in his US Government class. The professor asked Boudreaux if he knew what Roe vs. Wade was about. Boudreaux pondered the question then finally said, "Dat was da decision George Washington had to make before he crossed da Delaware "


SEVENTH DEGREE
Returning home from work, Boudreaux was shocked to find his house ransacked and burglarized. He telephoned the police at once and reported the crime. The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the radio, and a K-9 unit patrolling nearby was the first to respond. As the K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a leash, Boudreaux ran out on the porch, shuddered at the sight of the cop and his dog, then sat down on the steps. Putting his face in his hands, Boudreaux moaned, "Oh yai yai. Me, I come home to find all my possessions stolen. I call da police for help, and what y'all do? Y'all send me a BLIND officer!"
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Now, just for good measure, I'm throwing in a blonde joke and a lawyer joke so I can be an equal opportunity insulter! :D
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A blonde was weed-eating her yard and accidentally cut off the tail of her cat which was hiding in the grass.

She rushed her cat, along with the tail, over to Walmart! 

Why Walmart? 

HELLOOOOOOOOO! Walmart's the largest re-tailer in the world!!!
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A lawyer boards a plane in New Orleans...with a box of frozen crabs under his arm. He asks a blonde stewardess to take care of them for him.

She takes the box and promises to put it in the crew's refrigerator.

He advised her that he was holding her personally responsible for them staying frozen, mentioning in a very haughty manner that he's a lawyer, and proceeds to rant at her about what will happen if she lets them thaw out.
Needless to say, she is annoyed by his behavior. 

Shortly before landing in New York, she uses the intercom to announce to the entire cabin, "Would the gentleman who gave me the crabs in New Orleans please raise your hand?"

Not one hand went up, so she takes the crabs home and eats them. 

Two lessons here:

1. Lawyers aren't as smart as they think they are.
2. Blondes aren't always as dumb as most folks think.  



Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Writerly Wednesday ~~ Darrelyn's Pitch Fest Debacle


If you haven't met my friend Darrelyn Saloom, you really need to! She's a home girl Who Dat citizen, but better than that, she's a great writer and person.

Read all about her travels and terrors at a big conference agent pitch fest in a three-part guest blog series on Writer's Digest Jane Friedman's, THERE ARE NO RULES column here. [Scroll down at the site for parts 1 and 2.] You'll find great what-not-to-do tips to guide you on your own future pitch session.




A HAPPY NEW YEAR FULL OF MET WRITING GOALS TO ALL!!!!!!

Friday, December 17, 2010

Howdy!!!

Just flying by [yes, I keep my Halloween broom handy] to say "hey and love ya" to all! I've missed my blog buds, and *promise* to be a better post-er and visitor in the new year. :)

I hope you're all in the full swing of holiday preps, and are enjoying the good things life has to offer. I've been mega busy with family stuff and getting the winter issue of Rose & Thorn Journal ready for January 15th. (Don't forget to sign up for the free quarterly newsletters, k?) We've got a great menu of prose, poetry & art lined up for our readers' enjoyment.

<3's & huggage, and a VERY Merry Christmas too.

Lurve, Angie (Gumbo Writer)

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Writerly Wednesday ~~ LOBO Blog Contest!!



Hidy, writerly friends! Got a great little contest for you today with fab prizes!!!!!

We're all excited about Kat Magendie's THIRD book, SWEETIE's release! Here's a little taste from an early review...

Five stars. FIVE STARS to this book. I'm out of breath from being totally blown away by this beautiful coming-of-age story. Parts of this book reminded me of an old favorite book, The Shepherd of the Hills by Harold Bell Wright. Kathryn Magendie has captured some magic in her descriptions of the Smoky Mountains and has created a character in Sweetie that will live on in my memory.

I had a sneaking suspicion after reading the first chapter that I would like this book, but I did not expect it to flat out floor me. The development of the story, the characters, the way Magendie manipulates her readers emotions threw me for a loop and had me laughing and crying .. sometimes loudly. This is the perfect book for you folks who love a good coming-of-age story with a touch of magic in it. I cannot wait to get my greedy hands on a physical copy as soon as I can (as I received this via Netgalley).

Read the entire review here at The Lost Entwife. And another great one here: Library Thing.

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Now, about that contest........


This is a LOBO (Leave One, Bring One) event that's easier than it sounds. LOL. You simply leave a comment, and bring a friend to leave a comment too. Comment about what, you ask? Tell us what you love most about Kat and her writing or blog. Easy!


EXAMPLE:  "I love Kat's mountain hick voice. John T." Then your friend comes by and leaves his/her comment. "I think Kat is a beautiful person." Suzy Q (friend of John T.)


Contest Rules:


1.) Leave a comment on what you love best about Kat or her writing.


2.) Have a friend do the same, AND SIGN HIS/HER COMMENT WITH, "FRIEND OF (YOUR NAME)." You can comment as a friend for someone else only once, and also enter yourself by bringing another friend once.


3.) This isn't a requirement, just a favor -- please spread the word about this contest. SWEETIE and KAT deserve oodles of publicity. I know y'all love to Tweet and Facebook cool stuff, so how's about sharing the love? Thanks!


4.) Contest runs through Sunday midnight, December 5, Central Time. Use your imagination and writing skills. Creativity counts!


5.) PRIZE PACKAGE: Winner will receive a copy of SWEETIE, hot off the presses, signed by our friend and author, Kat Magendie; a lovely matching book cover necklace that says, "Hold out Hope" (you can see it looped over the cover in the photo below); some cool gel writing pens; and an Amazon or B&N gift certificate (winner's choice) for $20.00. As I'm prone to do, I may throw some other goodies in the pretty red gift bag too!

SO, GET BUSY, SPREAD THE WORD, AND GOOD LUCK TO ENTRANTS!!!



Get Sweetie at Amazon in paperback or for your Kindle!




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